This month has been a strange kind of whirlwind for me. I was sort of anxious about how stressed I was feeling (how's that for a double whammy of futility huh?), about my future, career, general happiness... and then I realized that I've never had to consider a relationship along with all of the other aspects of my life. Not in this way, anyway - where it's the sense of maintaining something that we both have acknowledged that we intend to be in for the long run. Not that Brian is a burden at all... it's just an entirely new experience, and I'm learning how to juggle it all.

I also have been confused about what I want out of the next six months of my life, what's best for me now versus what's best for my future... and how I'm going to get from the proverbial Point A to Point B. Finding love has shifted my priorities considerably, and while one of my reactions is to resent that, I've realized that this reaction is fueled by the society I've been in for the past three years. Why shouldn't I make love a priority? It is what moves me, invigorates me, inspires me. It's what completes me.

Anyway, my mind has been too tense for writing much in the past month, but I'm winding back down now and able to breathe a little bit. Figuratively, at least. The past week has run me down a little bit and I've had a cold for the past few days. Snif.