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30December | evidence of the decaying of my mind
So in my meme post below, I was faulty in stating that I saw no concerts in 2007. Actually, I saw two. The first was Hanson in early March. I went alone, in Sayreville, NJ. I left work early, took the train home, and drove there - got hopelessly lost trying to find the damn place (I am not the only one, either - the website even ACKNOWLEDGES IT though promptly denies it. Don't believe their lies! You can ask my dad - he was on the phone with me, giving me directions as I sobbed) - you can read about my thoughts on the show here. The second was Snow Patrol in late March. Jaymie and I saw them in Madison Square Garden - some sort of review here. Though it's more about my knees... sigh... Now... I really can't think of a reasonable explanation why I blanked on these two shows. I think 2007 has just felt like a really long year, and I've experienced it in these sort of phases that have individually been such undertakings that I've lost track of the passage of time. In packing up my room today I found a few notebooks from college (or maybe the first year in NYC) with pages of writing in them that I barely remember writing. I put them aside with plans to read through them when I have some time, and familiarize myself with the style and ease with which I used to write... not just words, but lyrics of my heart and mind. I feel so far removed from a time when I was romantic and passionate, and could weave beauty with my words, and not only feel something incredibly strong and encompassing for someone but also articulate it to them so that they might understand just how deep my feelings ran for them. Sometimes I get the sense that Brian doubts the intensity of my feelings - or the longevity of them, I suppose. And I think it's partially because of this block that's been in my head this past year. Although I've gained good things, I've also lost some pretty significant things as well, and I'm starting to see that rub off on my aura. My strength has always been in words and yet I feel like when I try to tell him how I feel, my tongue freezes and I'm not expressing myself in the way I'd like to. I want to change that. I think I should do Blog 365. Especially because I think 2008 is going to be a doozy.
29December | could outfit a small bedraggled army in my living room
This weekend has been spent packing up half my room so my parents can come to the city tomorrow and bring it home. I'm only doing half because I have another month to live here and obviously... I need stuff. The second shift happens in a couple weeks, and then I'll be living out of a suitcase the rest of the month. Exciting, right? Anyway - I decided that this would be an exercise in purging a lot of the crap that I've accumulated in the past two years. I produced 4 bags of trash - more to come, I bet - and 6 bags of clothes to donate to the Salvation Army. I could probably come up with more but I figure I can always do that in another shift when I'm home. I do want to bring these 6 bags to the Salvation Army tomorrow, so I can get them in time to submit them with my taxes next year. So I had to take them all out and inventory them. Here's the breakdown... Long-sleeved shirts: 26 What's that? You don't understand the magnitude of 153 pieces of clothing in your living room? Allow me to provide a visual:
Feel free to click to enlarge if you need to experience the monstrosity on a bigger scale. The most frightening part is that I still have mounds and mounds of clothing, both here and at home in Jersey, waiting and collecting dust. MOUNDS.
27December | a meme, as promised
What did you do in 2007 that you'd never done before? Did you keep your New Years' resolutions, and will you make more for next year? Did anyone close to you give birth? Did anyone close to you die? What countries did you visit? What would you like to have in 2008 that you lacked in 2007? What date(s) from 2007 will remain etched upon your memory, and why? What was your biggest achievement of the year? What was your biggest failure? Did you suffer illness or injury? What was the best thing you bought? Whose behavior merited celebration? Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed? Where did most of your money go? What did you get really, really, really excited about? What songs will always remind you of 2007? Compared to this time last year, are you... What do you wish you'd done more of? What do you wish you'd done less of? How will you be spending Christmas? Did you fall in love in 2007? How many one-night stands? What was your favorite TV program? Do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year? What was the best book you read? What was your greatest musical discovery? What did you want and get? What did you want and not get? What was your favorite film of this year? What did you do on your birthday, and how old? What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying? How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2007? What kept you sane? Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most? What political issue stirred you the most? Who did you miss? Who was the best new person you met? Was 2007 a good year for you? What was your favorite moment of the year? What was your least favorite moment of the year? Where were you when 2007 began? Who were you with? Where will you be when 2007 ends? Who will you be with when 2007 ends? What was your favorite month of 2007? How many different states did you travel to in 2007? How many concerts did you see in 2007? Did you have a favorite concert in 2007? Did you do anything you are ashamed of this year? What was the worst lie someone told you in 2007? Did you treat somebody badly in 2007? Did somebody treat you badly in 2007? If you could go back in time to any moment of 2007 and change something, what would it be? What are your plans for 2008?
27December | i am in for a world of change
Hope my straggling group of readers had a merry Christmas, or at least a nice nationally sanctioned couple days off. How nice that the government has decided that only Christians don't have to use up their vacation days to celebrate their holiday. ANYWAY I had an epiphanic four days, actually. I'm looking forward to a lot in 2008 (ooh, the end of the year means I get to do a bunch of 'looking back' memes... aka an easy way to slide back into a normal blogging schedule) but have a lot of logistical things to get through before I can get into the thick of it. January is packed for me... but I'm glad I get to start out with MY FIRST TRIP TO CALIFORNIA SINCE 1996!! Also, I just downloaded The Namesake soundtrack from Amazon.com. I needed new music and something that really speaks to me... not some crap radio fluff. I've been missing music in my life lately. I say that a lot. New York has become too much for me - it's killing my creative mind. I promise to start blogging more. One of my new year's resolutions.
15December | it was a long hiatus
This month has been a strange kind of whirlwind for me. I was sort of anxious about how stressed I was feeling (how's that for a double whammy of futility huh?), about my future, career, general happiness... and then I realized that I've never had to consider a relationship along with all of the other aspects of my life. Not in this way, anyway - where it's the sense of maintaining something that we both have acknowledged that we intend to be in for the long run. Not that Brian is a burden at all... it's just an entirely new experience, and I'm learning how to juggle it all. I also have been confused about what I want out of the next six months of my life, what's best for me now versus what's best for my future... and how I'm going to get from the proverbial Point A to Point B. Finding love has shifted my priorities considerably, and while one of my reactions is to resent that, I've realized that this reaction is fueled by the society I've been in for the past three years. Why shouldn't I make love a priority? It is what moves me, invigorates me, inspires me. It's what completes me. Anyway, my mind has been too tense for writing much in the past month, but I'm winding back down now and able to breathe a little bit. Figuratively, at least. The past week has run me down a little bit and I've had a cold for the past few days. Snif.
02December | stealing memes
Four First Names of Crushes I Had i am adding 'this year' to the stipulation to narrow it down... Four Pieces of Clothing I Wish I Still Owned Four Professions I Secretly Want to Try Four Musicians I'd Most Want to Go On a Date With Four Foods I'd Rather Throw Than Eat Four Things I Like to Sniff Oh come on, I had to. He always smells so nice :)
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