Recently I've made some decisions about my next career move that have both invigorated and exhausted me. I haven't been made to seriously doubt my ability to excel and inspire in about a year, but even then I still maintained confidence in the strengths that I'd always had. But now, I'm staring at the potential for a future in the face, and what stands in my way is... a whole lot of work.

In the next few weeks, I've got to fit reading, writing, research, and exploration into a life that's already filled with a job that's constantly overwhelming me, a lifestyle change (food, recreation, relaxation), and taking care of social relationships that have lately fallen by the wayside.

I'm excited, but uncertain - motivated, but frightened of venturing into new territory only to realize my own limitations. But as the rest of my peers head into their graduate education, this is my own independent study.

So this is what it's like to grow up yet again.